


Logan learns something new

by TheLateAlek



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Character Study, LAMP if you squint, M/M, One Shot, Spoilers, also a lot of avoiding emotions, i guess, i guess?, just logan realizing some things about his fellow sides
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2020-11-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:13:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27738214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLateAlek/pseuds/TheLateAlek
Summary: Logan prided himself in his knowledge of everything. So even though he would never admit it, he knew other sides like the back of his hand. Or at least he thought he did. After all he knew them for so long and “Thomas’ logic” wasn’t just an empty title. And he knew perfectly well that you learn something new every day, he himself was responsible for that function. The problems started when he realized that this “something” also includes other people and their feelings.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	Logan learns something new

**Author's Note:**

> It started as a writing exercise a few months ago and now it turned itself into this unnecessarily shippy fic without any action. Prepare for a whole lot of descriptions and not a lot of proper punctuation.

Logan prided himself in his knowledge of everything. So even though he would never admit it, he knew other sides like the back of his hand. Or at least he thought he did. After all he knew them for so long and “Thomas’ logic” wasn’t just an empty title. And he knew perfectly well that you learn something new every day, he himself was responsible for that function. The problems started when he realized that this “something” also includes other people and their feelings. 

Anxiety was the one that started his doubts. His usual smirk disappearing, the light in his eyes dimming and the usual malicious laughter stopping altogether. At first he thought that Virgil's anxiety levels were heightened, due to his constant exposure to public’s criticism towards Thomas. Any positive reaction was almost impossible to get out of the man, which he figured was Virgil finally establishing his character, but then… one bad day after another and finally Thomas’ anxiety disappeared completely. 

They weren’t too worried - why would they be? Anxiety always found his way back to them, even in the most unsuitable circumstances. But then Thomas started getting more and more reckless… If this foolery were to drag on then who knows what sorts of dangerous scenarios they would find themselves in. They had to go get Anxiety back, no matter how reluctant the side would be. After all if he didn’t, then The Duke would be the first one to grip the steering wheel in this figurative vehicle that was Thomas and it would certainly end up with a disaster. 

But it turned out that all Virgil needed was a boost of confidence. A chance at being the good guy. Someone believing in him. A simple second chance. Logan was disappointed that in that moment he was too nervous to be able to focus on anything other than his own loud and obnoxious thoughts. Despite that he still enjoyed the little things that he did remember from that situation - Virgil’s hopeful eyes when Roman complimented him and what felt like the first completely honest and vulnerable smile he had given them.

After that Logan found himself learning Virgil's habits from scratch. Sometimes his iconic smirk would make an appearance, but most of the time his smiles were small but so honest that they looked like pure sunshine. Unlike before the accident, now even his eyes seemed to laugh sometimes, despite his face trying to remain stern. But most importantly he stopped playing the villain everyone wanted him to be. And even though Logan would absolutely deny it if asked, he sometimes found himself smiling fondly at the thought of how open Virgil became and how vulnerable he let himself be in front of them. 

But Virgil couldn’t be the only one to hide his emotions. And so Logan started doubting others (a conspiracy board may have been included).

He never realized before how well Morality could hide his emotions. The realization hit him when they were in Patton’s room. The way his face changed in an instant and how eyes seemed to be the last barrier, holding back a waterfall of feelings. Logan saw that, and saw that barrier breaking and for a single moment his old, rusty heart managed to stop every thought in the freshly oiled brain. His vision centered only on those eyes and his only desire was to hold Patton, like if it was the last sane thought he ever got to have. 

Then at once everything snapped back into place. His brain caught up and made all of the necessary calculations, but he already decided - removing himself from the equation seemed like the best solution in order to minimize unnecessary feelings that may overshadow reason. Or how some would say, ,,cool off” so to speak.

In theory everything was okay after the incident. Or rather it should be if not for his doubts that followed him further into the future.

When Deceit attacked, he told himself that there was nothing to worry about. He was feeling off all day, but what’s a little weirdness. He saw the way Pattons’ lips seemed to move and form words differently. Like they were not used to this kind of energy coming out of them. The smile never disappeared, even for a second, like the person behind it had to carefully practice, in order to get even a shadow of Patton's usual kindness. The goofiness was gone, and the usual hand gestures seemed more deliberate and elegant, always accompanied by a shoulder roll. Logan never got quite a good look into those eyes - they shied away from him, which he assumed meant that Patton did something unrelated to the currently discussed crisis and would admit to it in a few hours. Only later did he realize that they were too serious and too aware of every single movement any of them made. 

Needless to say he didn’t mention a thing and the fact that Deceit complimented him right out of the gate absolutely didn’t have anything to do with it. Maybe it was a weird phase or maybe the topic made Patton a little bit anxious and there was no way that the dark sides would come, they didn’t “have the balls” nor were they strong enough to truly do any damage. Or at least that’s how he tried to explain it to himself. Usually he would be the first one to tell you that what you think or assume has no true meaning in the real world, but like he said, it was a weird day.

But after that, he did pay more attention to Patton, much to his unruly heart’s delight. He sat closer to him on the sofa to have a better view for his research. He started engaging in more activities with him in order to learn his behaviour in different habitats. He started seeking him out in his free time to make sure that the vulnerable side was okay…

And oh boy did he gather a ton of data. His cheeks never failed to blush when he thought about those sparkling joyous eyes, that held just as many undiscovered constellations as the freckles that were scattered all over Patton’s chubby face. Though at times the stars in Patton’s blue eyes were dimmed, he at least tried to be better at communicating his feelings. Logan sometimes had to excuse himself out of the room in order to stop his arms from hugging the man next to him. Those pale cheeks and somewhat empty eyes paired with lips that seemed to desperately want to smile but have long forgotten how to… All of it put Logan in a position where he could get closer to Patton, ensure his comfort, collect his data… But information about sad Patton always tasted bitter to the logical side. And even though sometimes he would push aside his need to learn more about his companion and do his best to comfort him, there were many times when he just didn’t know how, and the useless arms were throbbing with the need to… do what exactly? He didn’t know and he was scared and he didn’t want to accidentally hurt Patton, so he did the next worst thing - he left. Because at the end of the day he wasn’t chivalrous like Roman - he was a limpy researcher who was never good at interacting with others and now all of it was backfiring pretty hard.

And so when his emotions turned out to either be too much, or were telling him something about himself that he wasn’t ready to hear, he threw himself into even more research. 

This time his subject was Creativity. At first he didn’t think that a lot would come out of it - Roman wears his heart on his sleeve and expresses himself openly, letting his feelings be known to the whole world. Logan didn’t know what to do with those animated expressions and almost acted out movements. It genuinely seemed like Roman chose to keep all of the “good”, creative things and all of the “bad”, selfish things about himself, and erased everything in the middle. Logan was frustrated with Roman’s carefully selected personality traits, and his black and white view of the world, and his loud and obnoxious behaviour that was keeping anything gray in his heart hidden. But they weren’t the best of friends, so there could be something he was overlooking. Then again even Patton seemed to agree with him that Roman behaved more like a character on a TV would, and not like a real person. 

During their next discussion he observed Roman very carefully and came to a very… strange conclusion. Roman played as “The Prince” almost constantly, as if everything connected to a stereotypical Disney royalty was all the personality he needed. But there were very small and very rare exceptions that Logan noted. And the only controlled environment that he found was Virgil. Be it insults, compliments or even opinions about the weather - cracks appeared in Roman’s perfectly sculpted facade. His lips would waver, his shoulders tighten, his eyes sharpen and his whole stance screamed nervous. Or at least it did to Logan - after all he spent way too much time studying his movements for the past few days. But those little moments were important data that he needed to solve this puzzle.

The biggest issue was that Roman seemed to be doing it subconsciously. Like he chose to act as a character and then forgot that he’s actually just an actor. Logan thought about Creativity’s relationship with others… And about similar He and Virgil were. Two sides that did what everyone expected them to do. More of a cartoonish personality than a real person… He realized that all that was left to do was waiting until Roman would go through the same realization as Anxiety. And while that frustrated him, he decided to let it go at it’s own pace. Out of all of them he was the last one to even guess how long one is supposed to have an emotion-filled personality crisis like that.

After he couldn’t continue his research at the same pace, he found that his own perception of the others changed completely. His mind constantly made double takes, making sure that his eyes weren’t deceiving him. Sometimes he found himself struggling with all of the emotions the others had. The technique of mentioning it to someone else and leaving them to deal with it was almost always working, and his heart remained still for the most part.

That is until they started giving him looks. He wasn’t good at social cues and so he didn’t know whether the looks meant that his hair was a mess or that they were studying him the same way that he did them. He supposed that’s only fair - after all he did spend the last couple of months being quite intrusive. It would be hypocritical of him, to be annoyed at them for treating his almost completely dead heart like a puzzle, the same way he did theirs. But those thoughts led him to one question, he wasn’t sure he was ready to answer - what would he learn from their research into him?


End file.
